At the beginning of this year, Jennifer posted here about her focus for the year. I sat on it for a while (or 9 months) and I finally feel like I have my focus. Granted, I probably cheated by looking back to help me determine, but nonetheless. This year for me is about trust - Trusting the process. Or rather, trusting the One who leads the process. Taking a step, not knowing where the next step is, or where it will lead me. Trusting that He who leads my steps, gives me the discernment to know which step to take right now. I have spent a lot of time doubting. Doubting that I can trust myself. Doubting that I can trust the part of me that says the Lord is leading me in something. I have doubted the way I have interpreted scripture and then doubted how to apply it to my life. Looking back over 2010, I feel as though I can say for the first time in a long time that I am trusting. Trusting the Lord to lead me and trusting in my ability to use the discernment He provides me with.
I certainly don't make all the right choices all the time, but it is time to give myself some credit. I do make some right decisions some of the time. And I am doing the best job I can. My heart motive is to make the best choices for my family, and even when I blow it, that doesn't mean that I can't ever trust my decision making again.
So my commitment for 2010 is to trust. To trust first, my God and second, my gut.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
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