Thursday, January 27, 2011

A decade

I saw this idea on Elizabeth's page. I thought I would give it a try. My life has changed in so many ways over the past 10 years. I need to see it on paper (or on the screen as it may be).

2000-Bought a house with my best friend Brandy. Two single women with budding careers making our way in the world. This is the year that I really began building a relationship with Christ. This is the year that Timmarie and I met.

2001-Helped Brandy plan her wedding. We "Rocked the Reception" before it was coined. Contemplated how precious life is as we watched the twin towers fall on air.

2002-Fell in love. Got engaged. And met, for the first time, the family I now call friends- who live not close enough for my taste. Co-taught a teen girls bible study with Timmarie. Realized that I wanted her to become a life-long friend. Got the call that Addison had pushed her way into the world.

2003- Prepared for the fact that my future husband would probably be sent to war. Sold our house. Got married. Watched our country go to war and waited on pins and needles for "the call". Watched as my nephew, Gabriel, came into this world and moved straight into my heart.

2004-Began to understand what people meant when they told me marriage is hard. Went to marriage counseling. Came to rely on the Lord in ways I never had to before. Saw the Lord's hand move mightily in my life.

2005-Got the call that Brody was on his way. Wondered why I was always out of town when Timm had her babies...Discovered I was pregnant and became a little obsessed with all things fetal. Had a beautiful baby girl, finally agreed on a name, and discovered that all my years of training and experience had not prepared me one bit for motherhood.

2006-Became a stay at home mom. Sent my husband across the country to train for war. Tried to offer support to a friend when her world flipped upside down. Celebrated my baby girl turning one.

2007-Sent my husband to war and layed my fears at the Lords feet-repeatedly. Sat with my baby girl in the hospital while she struggled to breathe. Had my character built in more ways than I can count. Welcomed Brandy's second baby boy and had a blast watching the cousins get to know each other. Contemplated buying a house. Had an anxiety attack. Decided it wasn't the right time :)

2008-Welcomed my husband home. Transitioned from a family of 2 to a family of 3. Alivia got to know her dad with much trepidation. Kevin took a job across the state. Got a middle of the night call that rocked my world. Brandy's second son had passed away. Walked with my dearest friends through their darkest days. Knew my life had changed forever. I went back to work part time. Began training to teach military couples on the strong bonds of marriage. During this training, I discovered I was pregnant.

2009-Became the primary breadwinner-on a very small part time income. Experienced more stress than I should have tried to bear. My water broke prematurely and we welcomed a very small but very healthy son into our family. Tried to adjust to life as a family of 4. Discovered head knowledge does not equal heart knowledge. After much prayer and trepidation, I asked Kevin for a separation.

2010-Fought hard for my marriage. Learned a lot of hard lessons about the Character of God. Said goodbye to a brother-in-law and friend. Went to marriage counseling. Had my world rocked in ways I had hoped would never be. Watched the metaphorical house of cards fall. After much prayer, filed for divorce. Began to readjust to life as a family of 3.

My wish for 2011 is that I continue to grow in my relationship with the Lord and that I never grow cold to His unfailing faithfulness. Even in my darkest, loneliest day over the past 10 years, He has been with me. He is my comforter, my protector and ALWAYS has my best interest at heart. I hope that 2011 has less hard lessons. But even if it doesn't, I trust that my God is the same. Yesterday, Today and Forever.


Sunday, January 16, 2011

Little Elves...

Our family home has had some quirks since we bought it. And we had gained some extras as time has gone on. Our littles have needed some services more than we have needed a kitchen sink that didn't turn itself off. Back in October, one of our toilets broke. And our replacement toilet didn't fit under the countertop. When Chris had surgery in October (I know - it was a killer month) he fell into our bathroom wall creating a giant hole. It's just stuff - little annoyances here and there that we just could never get to.

Over Christmas, we were able to spend a glorious week of vacation with my family...the 4 of us together for 8 days was a sweet, sweet thing. We got home and mourned that our time together was coming to an end. And then we noticed: the drywall down our hallway had been repaired. And then we noticed a working toilet. And less of a countertop. And a working sink. And no more hole in our bathroom. Little elves had entered while we had been away and blessed us tremendously with not just the gift of repairs, but of more TIME as a family. These acts of service were beyond kind, they were a clear reminder that God does see the littlest details. The anonymous givers blessed a hard-working husband and father, and brought much celebration into our home.


Monday, January 10, 2011


I don't like it for one minute that you are now six, Brody. I remember your tiny body fitting into preemie clothes for the first few weeks of your life, and I just don't know how we got to the place where you are in a size 3 1/2 shoe. You are a tall, blue-eyed explosion of energy. Your smile is incredible. Your laugh completely infectious.

I'm just not sure how to put into words what I feel when it comes to you. You are a reminder of God's goodness, and yet His mysteriousness. You are evidence of His grace and of His delight. Your life is covered in His fingerprints - a constant image of the Hope we have in Him.

You love your friends young and old. You adore your Gma K. You always want to go to G's house. You are a computer guy. And an animal guy. And a smart guy. Your report card brought me untold joy when it stated that you talk excessively in class!

There is so much to celebrate about you, Brody. And I want to take every opportunity that the Lord allows to do just that! I love you to the moon and back. And even beyond that, sweet boy.


Saturday, January 1, 2011


I have at least 3 partial posts waiting to be completed. I have so much I want to share with all of you, and I want to write about 2010 and my hopes for 2011. But, these past couple of weeks have been filled with celebrating the birth of our Savior, my daughter's 5th birthday, Alivia & Brody's birthday party, a week off with my kiddos, and the birth of a baby.

So for now I say, Happy New Year...and I hope to be back to writing on the blog soon.